“How to put a girl in her place.”

That’s a sentence that usually raises eyebrows. But is it really that bad? If so, what else can you do to deal with a disrespectful partner?

Let’s explore this idea further.

Is It a Bad Idea?

“Putting a partner in their place” is a misguided approach that often leads to relationship troubles. Let’s break down why this process is problematic.

Define Where “Her Place” Is in Your Life

First, you need to examine what you mean by “her place.” In a healthy relationship, her place should be by your side, as your loving partner.

Ideally, both individuals support each other and want the best for one another. The best-case scenario is to base a relationship on mutual understanding, respect, and admiration.

Sure, there’s a bit of give and take to be expected. But both partners should feel valued and heard. When you start thinking about putting someone in their place, you’re already creating an imbalance that can lead to resentment.

Don’t Play Games

One of the most common dating mistakes ever, especially among college students and young adults, is playing games. While these games seem clever at the moment, they’re often immature and counterproductive.

Yes, we know women engage in their version of game-playing, like testing men by throwing verbal curveballs to gauge their reactions. However, responding to these shenanigans with more games only creates an atmosphere of distrust and sets the stage for future problems.

Instead of making a game out of “putting your girl in her place,” it’s better to be honest and transparent about your intentions.

Understand That It Reflects Badly on You

Contrary to what some might think, constantly needing to “put your girl in her place” doesn’t make you look like an “alpha male.” In fact, it can have the opposite effect, making you seem insecure and unable to handle challenges maturely.

If you always find yourself in a situation where you feel disrespected by your partner, try to examine how you carry yourself in general. After all, respect is often a reflection of how a person presents themselves to the world.

Annoyed woman upset after a conversation with her partner

Consider these aspects:

  • Do you speak clearly and confidently, or do you mumble and use conversation fillers?
  • Do you struggle with eye contact?
  • Is your appearance neat and put together?
  • Most importantly, do you see yourself as a confident person worthy of respect and love?

What Else Is There to Do?

Alright, let’s ditch the idea of “putting your woman in her place” and explore some healthier ways to build strong, respectful relationships.

Examine Your Motivations

First things first, take a moment to reflect on your goals.

Are you seeking to punish or retaliate because a woman made you feel bad about yourself? Or do you genuinely want to improve your relationship?

If it’s the first option, you might want to end things right now. There’s no point turning a relationship into a meaningless competition.

Of course, how much you’re committed matters, too.

For established relationships, consider couples counseling or having a heart-to-heart chat. If, however, you’re in a newer relationship and notice that she’s disrespecting you a lot, it might be wise to bow out early to avoid potential drama down the road.

Have Deep Conversations and Set Boundaries

Clear boundaries are a must in any relationship.

So, when faced with disrespect, the best course of action is to have an honest conversation about your feelings. Use “I” statements to get your point across without sounding accusatory.

Worried couple Having a conversation together

For example, “When you [specific action], I feel [emotion]. It makes me uncomfortable, and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t do it again.”

If the behavior continues, remind your partner of your previous chat and restate your boundary. Be consistent, and if nothing changes after a couple of times, consider ending things.

Be Kind (But Not a Doormat)

Maybe the girl in question isn’t your romantic partner. Perhaps she’s your coworker, relative, or someone in your social circles.

In this case, “ending things” with her might not be a viable option, and you’ll have to find other solutions.

You could respond with kindness or a sense of humor. But you might have to halt the spiral of rudeness by calling her out on her behavior at some point.

Take Responsibility for Your Needs

Many people, especially those who consider themselves “nice guys,” struggle with identifying and meeting their own needs.

Start asking yourself: What makes me happy? What do I want out of my social life? Once you’ve got a handle on your needs, take steps to fulfill them.

You can’t lash out when she fails to meet your standards when you aren’t even aware of your own needs and desires.

Respect Yourself Before Demanding Respect From Women

Self-respect is key to earning respect from others, and confident women are no exception. When you carry yourself with confidence and treat yourself well, you set the standard for how others should treat you. 

Build self-respect by taking care of your appearance, improving your eye contact, adopting a confident body language, and pursuing your passions. Respect yourself, and you’ll likely attract partners and friends who’ll do the same!

Know When to Walk Away

Sometimes, despite your best efforts, walking away from a relationship might be the healthiest choice. That’s usually the case if you’ve tried communicating and setting boundaries but still can’t get a positive reaction.

A couple sitting upset on a couch after an argument

You might have a difficult time at first, but there are plenty of fish in the sea. You can find a potential partner who’ll treat you right. Don’t let fear keep you stuck in a toxic relationship.

And if you’re struggling to navigate these waters, don’t hesitate to reach out to a therapist or counselor. They can offer valuable insights to help you build healthier relationships later with your dream girl.

Final Thoughts

Healthy relationships thrive on open communication and finding common ground.

Your goal shouldn’t be to put anyone in their place but to create a partnership where both sides feel valued and respected.